A Mighty Sad Dog...

Years ago, I heard my pastor make a statement from the pulpit that has stuck with me ever since: "It's a mighty sad dog that won't wag its own tail."

Of course, I laughed when I heard it, but like most good sayings, the longer I sat with it, the more truth I found underneath the humor.

There are some incredibly talented people walking around waiting for somebody else to tell the world how good they are. They have an abundance of knowledge, outstanding skills, innovative ideas, and tremendous passion. They do great work.

But when it's time to talk about that work, advocate for themselves, share an idea, pursue an opportunity, or simply say, "Hey, I did that," they suddenly become silent.

They've been taught not to brag. Don't make everything about you. Let your work speak for itself. Be humble. Listen, I absolutely believe in humility, but somewhere along the way, some of us got humility confused with invisibility.

Telling yourself that your work will speak for itself sounds wonderful, but it isn't always true. Your work may be excellent, but your work doesn't have a mouth.

You do.

Your work can't walk into your supervisor's office and explain the problem you solved. Your work can't tell the interview panel about the idea you developed. Your work can't correct the record when someone else gets credit for your contribution. Your work can't raise its hand when an opportunity becomes available and say, "I'm ready."

You have to do that.

Despite these facts, I've watched talented people sit quietly in meetings while someone else presents an idea they helped create. I've watched people minimize their accomplishments during interviews because they don't want to sound boastful. I've watched employees consistently perform above expectations and then become frustrated because nobody seems to recognize everything they're doing.

And sometimes, leadership absolutely deserves some responsibility for that. Good leaders should pay attention, recognize people, and give credit where credit is due. But your career is too important to make recognition entirely someone else's responsibility.

At some point, you've got to wag your own tail.

I think a lot of good people get stuck in this space because they tend to imagine confidence and humility sitting on opposite ends of a spectrum.

They tell themselves, "If I talk about my accomplishments, I'm bragging." "If I acknowledge that I'm good at something, I'm conceited." "If I make sure people know I contributed to a project, I'm trying to take all the credit." "If I advocate for a promotion, I'm being entitled." "If I walk into a room believing I belong there, somebody might think I'm arrogant."

So they shrink. They soften their accomplishments. They say things like: "Oh, it wasn't a big deal." "The whole team did it." "I just helped a little."

Sometimes the whole team absolutely deserves credit. But sometimes you did the work. Sometimes you had the idea. Sometimes you solved the problem. Sometimes you led the project. Sometimes you were the reason it succeeded.

Acknowledging that doesn't require you to diminish anyone else's contribution. Humility is not about pretending you're less capable than you really are. Humility requires you to be honest about both your strengths and your limitations.

I think another area that tends to trip us up sometimes is confusing confidence with arrogance.

Confidence can acknowledge someone else's brilliance without feeling threatened by it. Arrogance needs to be the smartest person in the room.

Confidence can say, "I don't know." Arrogance pretends to know because admitting otherwise feels risky.

Confidence accepts feedback because competence doesn't require perfection. Arrogance interprets correction as disrespect.

Confidence shares credit. Arrogance collects it.

You don't have to choose between being humble and knowing your value. You can do both.

Waiting for someone else to notice how good you are at what you do is not a career strategy.

The workplace isn't a talent show where somebody is constantly sitting in the audience looking for the undiscovered superstar. People are busy. Your supervisor is busy. Senior leaders are busy. Opportunities move quickly. Decisions are sometimes made based on the information available at the moment.

If you've spent years making yourself invisible, you can't always be surprised when you're overlooked.

Sometimes you have to tell people what you're interested in. Sometimes you have to ask for the opportunity. Sometimes you have to volunteer for the project. Sometimes you have to share the idea. Sometimes you have to say, "I'd like to be considered." Sometimes you have to explain exactly what you contributed. Sometimes you have to apply for the job even though you aren't sure you're ready.

And sometimes you simply need to raise your hand for no other reason than you believe you have something valuable to contribute.

There will always be a place for humility. There will always be value in letting other people shine. There will always be moments when the right thing to do is step back, listen, learn, and allow someone else to have the spotlight.

But humility should never require you to disappear.

You have worked too hard, learned too much, and survived too much. You've developed skills, gained experience, solved problems, made mistakes, learned lessons, and accumulated something valuable along the way. You have something to contribute. So contribute it. Speak up. Share the idea. Apply for the opportunity. Correct the record when necessary. Accept the compliment without immediately explaining why you don't deserve it. Tell people what you accomplished. Say what you're good at.

And when the moment comes, don't stand quietly in the corner waiting for somebody else to tell the room what you bring to it.

Because my pastor was right. It's a mighty sad dog that won't wag its own tail.

You don't have to bark louder than everybody else. You don't have to bite anybody. And you certainly don't have to knock over the furniture.

Just don't be afraid to WAG YOUR TAIL!